Bonus Episode 21 - The Great Chili Debate

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This month we've got these exciting do gets!

- Salsa
- Chili
- 40 Hours
- Rain

Quickly becoming the leading condiment on Earth Salsa is like ketchup, but for Mexican food, and has many different flavors. I guarantee out there somewhere is a Salsa for you. I think I am going to create an online dating website for Salsa, then one for Whiskey.

Hotly contested second Do Get this month. Chili, one host loves it, and one host hates it. Is this the end of HWIDG?

Bouncing off an issue in episode 85, 40 hours? Is it an issue or a Do Get? Listen to both episodes and you decide, or is Tab just really trying to hammer home that he has a job and that's why he stopped doing Madcucks. I mean he totally isn't going bald and blocking people because he's been infected.

Our final do get this month is Rain. Where would we be without the magical water falling from the sky? We'd be dead. So put on your dancing shoes and summon some rain clouds while you're listening to this great episode.

As always thank you so much to our patreon supporters, be sure to check out the Discord if you haven't already. Comment below on which side of the Chili Debate you fall.

Bonus Commentary - Ready Player One

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Tab and Tim sit down for a grueling day in the reference mines to dig up some old gems of pop culture lost to the ages. This commentary has more pet rocks and gundams than you can shake a stick at. Get your counters ready because we're tallying the fuck out of this movie to determine scientifically if it is terrible or not, (Spoilers) it is.

So grab you favorite amazon prime, or torrent site and get to watching what will go down as Steven Spielberg's easiest paycheck. Ready Player One.

Tab and Tim Watch - DOUBLE BONUS - The Ladykillers

Available now for all HWIDG Patrons

What is my favorite movie of all time. Tom Hank's 2004 incredible role as Golthwait Higginson Dorr PhD a mastermind of the heist of the century. Watch this fuckin movie, it's literally the best thing the Cohens have ever done. Then get ready to watch it again, because I hit play immediately after watching this movie.

Tab and Tim Watch - Independence Day (ft. Truckin and Tuckin)

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This month features the greatest american story ever told. The 1996 BTFO of a bunch of hentai aliens from the planet fuck off. In a movie that peaked Jeff Goldblum, Sky Rocketed Will Smith, Features Jayne Cobb before the Cobb, and stars the greatest movie extra the world has ever seen. Independence Day should be your most beloved American tradition.

We also bring in our long time friend Truckin and Tuckin who we've talked about on the show. How long does it take, and who is the first one to doxx his real name? Find out when you watch Independence Day.

And visit the form to submit next month's commentary!

Ask Uncle Buck Ep 04 (Ft. Nick Rekieta)

Professional lawsplainer Nick Rekieta joins me this month to ask the burning questions that YOU want answered!

Minisode 8 - Tweet Tweet Pop Pop

Available now for all HWIDG Patrons!

This month these tiny issues annoy us.

- Grass
- Watered Down Fruit
- Birds
- Not getting the pop
- Yoga

Bonus Episode 20

Available now to all $5 Patrons!

This month on Here's what I do get.

Getting Back to Work
Steam's new content policy
Meat
Garbage Collection

Tab and Tim Watch - Bloodsport

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The results are in and Bloodsport is this month's winner. A movie that Tab has never seen and Tim hasn't seen in a long time. Bloodsport brings back the best of the 80s! Stereotypical honor minded oriental characters, easy casual sex with reporters, endearing bromance, and most of all a simple plot that explains itself in 20 minutes, and the rest of the film can just be awesome fights. What isn't there to love. So sit back and enjoy this month's Bloodsport commentary.

Ask Uncle Buck Episode 3 Extras

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Peek behind the curtain of HWIDG with some pre-show banter!  Why does Tab have pizza?  Who gave Buck the creeps?  How do you clean a soldering iron?  Find out inside!

Ask Uncle Buck Ep 3 (ft. Tab Birt)

If you miss that "season 2" vibe, then Buck-le up, because Tab joins me as the guest moderator, and wow was it fun!

Minisode 7 - Little Women

Available now for all HWIDG Patrons!

Welcome to the final bonus bits for this month.

- Windows Notifications
- No Mens Dish Gloves
- Lack of Backup Baskets
- Small Monsters
- Flys

Hey, it's Windows Here. I need to tell you about this important Bonus Episode that just released on HWIDG!

Maybe you're a sensitive man, not wanting to have a bunch of chemicals directly on your skin. Well fuck you because latex gloves, are the only thing on earth that are safe for women, and fuck you for trying to co-opt that safe space.

You're at the store, and finally you find a bunch of gloves for men. You're ecstatic. Guess what? In your hopeless state you didn't bother to grab a basket when you walking into the store. That's fine; as you walk to the front of the store. Only to never find the aisle ever again. Why wasn't a basket near you when you needed it?

You're trying to determine where the aisle possible could have gone. Maybe it was stolen by a monster. It would have to be a big one though, because small monsters are fucking lame. Anything that can be kicked out of a window, or disabled by capturing it in a box is not scary. I'm looking at you you goddamn fly in the house.

Flys are stupid. They just fly around bumping into shit, and getting trapped in your blinds making you go crazy trying to kill the fucker. There are no windows in the Handle Breaker house because he over zealously tried to kill all the flys and just bust through the whole window.

Well that is out Minisode this month. Thank you for supporting the show. We have 2 special bonus episodes coming soon for everyone, and an even specialer $5 Bonus Episode.

Bonus Episode 19 - Water Heater Hacks

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The heat is on, folks. On the stove, in the sky, oppressing the ones you love with it's sweltering radiance. Here at Here's What I Don't Get, we're trying to keep cool by any means necessary, cold showers, popsicles, the works. We find what works best is sticking the following do gets in the freezer for about 15 minutes:

- Hot Water
- Cooking Competition shows
- Bullying
- Getting rid of things

Due to the amount of rage Tab has to deal with, he often comes home from a long day of work covered in the blood of various people. A mildly warm shower won't take care of that. No, you need a black market shower head built for elephants, and a hacked water heater. The steam opens up your pores, you know.

Chopped, Cutthroat Kitchen, Top Chef, MasterChef, Tim loves 'em all. Can't get enough. Seriously. And Tab has a problem with that. High cuisine and fine dining are a whole other world it seems. Prepare yourselves for a four course meal in what may be the most controversial do get yet.

Bullying. A little goes a long way. No one should be getting pounded in the face for wearing glasses, but just like in exercise where you break down those muscles and they grow back stronger, a little bullying and standing up to it prepares you for life. Unfortunately, zero tolerance policies these days let the kids know that defending yourself is wrong. Sounds to me like the school administrators need a bit of bullying themselves.

Minimalism, it's all the rage these days. Living minimally means getting rid of those superfluous things that take up all that room. Burn them if you have to. Just get rid of them. With flames. Dancing against the night sky. The ashes land on your tongue. They taste sweetly of bitterness. The fire is in us all. Release it.

Thanks for supporting the podcast folks, we couldn't do it without you! I mean, we could, but it wouldn't be as fun. Don't forget to Vote on Next Month's Commentary 

Road To Infinity War - Episode 10 - Guardians of the Galaxy

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Tim joins me for this thrilling recap of what may be the most fun movie of the MCU. I know Infinity War is out, but I'll keep powering through these until the end with a big recap of Infinity War at the end.

Tab and Tim Watch: Tucker and Dale vs Evil

Available now to all $10 Patrons

It was a close call in the voting this month and we had to actually go deep into the rankings to figure out a clear winner. So we will be updating the votes for a ranked choice vote point system. The winner with 82 points for May was Tucker and Dale vs Evil a movie half of us have seen. It actually turns out really good, we both enjoyed it and you will too. Thanks for supporting the show this month and don't forget to submit the next movie!

Minisode 6 - Patreon, We Shrunk Ourselves

Available now for all HWIDG Patrons!

Sliding in at the last second is April's Minisode where we discuss these minor issues.

- The Room
- The Premature Nod Off
- People That Don't Eat Pizza Crusts
- The Inconsistency of Movie Popcorn
- Post Movie Shoes
- The 45 Minute Snow Day Make Up

What may be the most boring movie ever made, The Room. Why do people watch this movie? Ironically? No you're all idiots this movie is bad, and you should feel bad, it puts me to sleep.

Putting me to sleep, well that is our second issue, nodding off prematurely. You're sitting there, you start nodding off, you decide you've earned a little siesta. Lay down... WELL FUCK YOU NOW IT'S TIME TO LAY WIDE AWAKE!! Thinking about all the people that have wronged you.

One of those people, the asshole that doesn't eat pizza crust. Mother fucker, you have eaten a fuck load of crust up to the end, and now you have a problem. K-k-k-k-k-kill Yourself.

Speaking of eating a fuckload of things, why the fuck can't I get decent popcorn for $10? Microwave popcorn is always perfect yet somehow a bag of popcorn that costs more than the employees working there make in an hour can't meet a consistent quality assurance level? God damnit.

Then post movie all that shitty popcorn that you dropped on the floor? Now you have styrofoam feet, I hope that polished concrete isn't too slick or you might die.

Finally schools were closed here in OK for two weeks so the teachers could cry about money. Instead of making those days up at the end of the year (Or you know, having the teachers do their fucking job), they get to make them up by adding 45 minutes to each school day getting kids out later and teaching them fuck nothing.

Well that is this month's episode, thanks for supporting the show everyone, we'll see you next month. May's commentary will be a couple days late, due to Tim and I's schedules not lining up. Plus we may be having a special guest for Episode 75 this week. Stay tuned.

The Room, Premature Nod Off, People That Don't Eat Crusts, Inconsistent Movie Popcorn, Post Movie Shoes, Snow Day Make Up

BONUS pre-show chatter from Ask Uncle Buck Season 2 Episode 2

Available now for all $5 Patrons!

A few minutes of catch up banter between Chaco and Buck.  A few laughs, and a behind-the-curtain explanation.

Road to Infinity War - Episode 9 - Captain America: The Winter Soldier

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The movie that I have seen in theaters nearly a dozen times, Captain America The Winter Soldier. When Hydra re-emerges Captain America calls no one else and solves the fucking problem himself. Meanwhile The Winter Soldier is hunting him down, will it be his best friend Bucky? The answer may shock you.

In what may be the best of the MCU, this movie delivers on everything but excessive jokes. Watch it, watch it right now.

Coming next is Guardians of the Galaxy with Tim the Handle Breaker

Ask Uncle Buck Ep 2 (ft Joel Chaco)

ARE YOU INTERESTED NOW, KIMBELL!?

Road to Infinity War - Episode 8 - Thor: The Dark World

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In the first of the unnumbered sequels of the MCU we have Thor: The Dark World. The evil Doctor Who has returned from somewhere to bring an end to the universe, because reasons...

Is this the worst of the MCU? Does Jane foster become more than a cardboard standee, or will she take a name through a good portion of the film? Will this be the shortest episode of Road to Infinity War? Listen to find out!

Road to Infinity War - Episode 7 - Iron Man 3

Available now for all $2 Patrons!

Well boys and girls it is time for Phase II and not the one where we make tesseract weapons despite not having the tesseract. No this is Phase II of the MCU where the movies get jokier, and the heroes get sullener. I watched Iron Man 3 some say the worst of the Iron Man franchise do I agree do I disagree? You'll have to listen to find out. Big thanks to myself from 5 years ago for the thumbnail art I made in an art class. Next up is everyone's favorite, Thor: The Dark World.