Welcome back to HWIDG Presents: Wacky Facts! Did you know everything The Beatles wrote took just 8 years? Or that Michelangelo spent 4 years painting the Sistine Chapel and 3 years sculpting the seventeen foot tall David? Did you know that Alexander the Great's massive empire expansion took 10 years? And did you know that from conception to opening, Disney World took 6 years to make? Or that the discovery and implementation of nuclear power was just 10 years? And what about the musical artist Buckethead, who has released 229 albums in 13 years? Or that it took 12 years and 5 months for Voyager 1 to launch and travel to THE EDGE OF OUR SOLAR SYSTEM AND SEND ITS FINAL PICTURE FROM SIX BILLION KILOMETERS AWAY ON A POWER SUPPLY SMALLER THAN THE ONE IN THE COMPUTER I'M USING TO TYPE THIS? ISN'T THAT AMAZING? YEAH, IT IS! SO I'VE GOT JUST ONE MORE QUESTION? WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN DOING FOR THIRTEEN YEARS MAYNARD? TOOL IS GREAT, IT'S NOT VOYAGER 1 GREAT! DANNY? HOW MANY TIME CHANGES ARE YOU GOING TO DRUM THROUGH ON THIS ALBUM. IT HAD BETTER BE THE MOST IN MUSIC HISTORY TO HAVE TAKEN SO LONG! Anyways, catch us again next week for more Wacky Facts about:
* Rude People
* Foot Fetishists
* Use It or Lose It
Rudeness. It's a virus. Whether passed down from parents or contracted from secondhand rudeness, it blocks certain synapses in the brain that are responsible for appropriate social politeness. Like wearing headphones (that don't leak) while listening to music in cramped spaces like a bus. Or, not playing on your phone at full brightness at a movie theater during a movie, or not leaving your rented electric scooter in the middle of the road or sidewalk, you know, just basic social niceties the rest of the world follows because the world doesn't revolve around you.
"Why do we fall, sir?" "So our parents can pick us up, treat our wounds, then sue the city for improper street management, all the while we get to play Angry Birds on the iPad and watch Elsa versus Spider-Man videos on YouTube!" - Christopher Nolan's The Dark Knight (2024). Kids make mistakes. Their brains are literally not all there yet. They don't have experience. You touch a hot stove, you learn not to touch it again. This is how we learn. We observe, attempt, and evaluate. The parent's job is to make sure they don't die, and then to facilitate that learning, not to do it for them. Kids are literally on leashes these days. LITERALLY. Leashes when they go out, iPad MOVING COLORS at home. KEEP EM QUIET, KEEP EM BUSY.
People are into weird stuff, man. Are there things out there worse than feet? Of course there are. We've all seen glimpses of them on those "edgy" sites, but feet might be the most baffling. At least you've got mainstream support. Tarantino's a household name, and he prominently features feet quite often. Then the BIGGEST THING IN THE WORLD, the MCU hires Joss Whedon aboard, and now he's got his foot fetish fantasies inserted into TWO OF THE TOP TEN MOVIES OF ALL TIME. THROUGH DISNEY. HE GOT YOU WEIRDOS PRIME 'FOOT'AGE PAST DISNEY. DISNEY! It's mainstream now, baby. Next, watch for Avengers 5, where Spider-Man and Black Panther openly talk about how much they love eating ass.
LIMITED TIME EVENT. ONE WEEK ONLY. HURRY, TIME'S ALMOST UP! Hey, guess what jackholes? We're adults with things to do and jobs to work and lives to live. How bout I do the thing when I want to at a reasonable time for both of us. You want the money. I want to give money to you. Let me do that. Just take my money. It's not hard to do. If it is? I'm probably willing to pay a bit more if you tell me how hard it is. THAT'S MORE MONEY. THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT.
All this and more on this week's episode! Voicemails, news, and Todd probably brings something up right as we're signing off! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD and support us on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT.