Episode 298 - A Voltron of Ghosts — Here's What I Don't Get

Introducing Here's What I Don't Raft, the only authorized podcast white-water rafting trip on the eastern seaboard. For only $299.99 plus rental costs, you can join the HWIDG crew on the wettest, drunkest ride of your life, aside from that one time in college. Order now and you can secure a guaranteed tip-over by the crew. Order the platinum package for $499.99 and you'll get the official 2023 HWIDR beer koozie and :

- Having Your Cake and Eating It Too
- Zipper Morons
- Not Swinging the Axe
- Luxury Phones

Don't you love greed? The fat kid that hogs all the cake. The guy that cuts the line. The scalper that buys up all the stock to resell. Disney. Meta. All these companies keep buying up little subsidiaries so they grow bigger and make more money than ever, making record breaking profits. And they have the gall to then turn around and make us pay more for their products. And we stand there and take it, like good little altar boys.

We all have zippers. Pants, jackets, bags, our life is filled with them. And they're very simple objects. You look at one and pull it up and down a few times, and ta-da you know how it works. But apparently the world is filled with morons who think zippers are magic. Portals to the dimension of things staying closed. So it's no wonder why they can't be asked to merge lanes in traffic properly in the zipper method. It's either-me-me-me like a loose zipper slider, straight to the front without regard for anyone else, or stuck in place letting everyone else past because their daily affirmation said "do a random act of kindness today".

Horror, like many genres stands to amplify the best and worst of humanity. The zombie survival sub-genre in particular shows the lengths we'll go to to survive. So what happens when the fan-favorite character gets bitten or scratched? The heroes have no time to lose, they've got to chop off the limb in order to stop infection. Then they get a cool blade arm attachment or whatever. In this analogy the infection is a cash-bleeding bad decision project like Batgirl. At least they had the balls to cut it off before it did any damage.

Remember when you could buy the coolest, hippest phone in the world for 15 bucks? Back in the 90's, 15 smackeroos got you the cutting edge of technology: the see-thru phone. 15 years ago I bought a new slider phone for 20 or 30 bucks. Because they were just the vehicle for service. You can text or call on any phone, they were just hunks of plastic. Then they got smart. Have they gotten even smarter since 2007? A little bit. A tad. But not 3 or four times as much. The original iPhone was 500 bucks. Expensive for sure, but the cutting edge of phone and pocket technology. These days? 500 bucks will get you a solid phone. More than you need, not the top end, but solid. Yet we've got people spending near 2 grand for the same thing but it folds.

All this and more on this week's episode! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD, support us through the end on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT.