Episode 279 - AirBnBattery

You know what gets people talking? Celebrities! You know what gets people talking about celebrities non-stop? Celebrity drama! So, taking a page from Tinseltown, HWIDG is now Here's What I Don't Get (About Celebrities)! Every week on  HWIDG(AC) we'll each pit our chosen celebrity of the week against each other in a potential beef. Will it be Estelle Getty versus Wesley Snipes, Tom Hanks versus Robert Redford, or Jackie Chan versus Larry the Cable Guy? No one knows! We'll duke it out on their behalf each week until we've got a bracket-style tournament to find out who will be crowned the ultimate celebrity! And what is the ultimate prize? The quickest death! That's right, the ultimate winner will be granted the sweet, sweet mercy of a swift kill as opposed to all the losers who will be subject to the torturous, highly painful, gruesome deaths they deserve!

- "That's Assault"
- Hotels
- The Birthday Boy
- Meta

Laws are not steadfast rules. If you kill an armed burglar breaking into your home, you usually don't go to prison for murder. We bend them from situation to situation to fit what is socially acceptable. Except when we don't. It's why someone ends up on the sex offender registry for pissing in an alley. Or a bullied kid gets suspended for standing up for himself. The zero tolerance approach hurts everyone. Sometimes people need to hash some problems out, and sometimes that way is with their fists. And we need to let them. We need public fight referees, and I volunteer.

In this time of airbnb and Vrbo, why do we need hotels? to Pay 3-5 times as much for skeeted-on sheets and stale muffins? To pay 39.99 for some softcore MILF action? To pay 8 bucks for a Snickers bar at the tiny shop in the lobby? To pay hourly for internet in the "Business Center"? To be disturbed by housekeeping when you're trying to rest? To steal the travel-sized 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner and add them to your horde of others? We tolerated hotels because that's what we had when we couldn't stay with someone where we were visiting, but now, we can stay at strangers' summer houses for a fraction of the price!

A lot of kids are endowed with a sense of entitlement on their birthdays. They're the big birthday boy! It's their special day! Or week! They should live like kings and queens! Do you think the kids thought this up? Of course not. Eventually they become adults and become busy with work and bills and kids and that sense of entitlement is passed down to the next generation, and the cycle continues. So you've got kids who think they can do whatever they want, and parents who want to let the kid do whatever the want getting in the way of the other 99.7% of people who couldn't care less, and honestly these kids should probably be taught this lesson early on. A quick body slam never hurt much.

Remember when Ferris Bueller talked to you, the person watching the screen, breaking that fourth wall? Or when Deadpool knew he was in a comic book? Or when Daffy Duck was tormented by his animator? Now everything is self-aware and "meta". Gotta put those fan jokes and memes right back into the source material so that the fans know you're listening to them! The problem with this is that almost no show these days is funny or smart enough for it to seem like anything other than a blatant "LOOK, REMEMBER THIS?" moment for YouTubers to circle with a red arrow on this week's TOP 10 THINGS YOU MISSED IN MARVEL DISNEY+ SHOW #15!

All this and more on this week's fast and furious episode! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD, support us on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT.