Episode 73 - Gotta Captcha 'Em All
/
The year is 20XX. Machines have taken over the world. The human resistance Here’s What I Don’t Get has been forced into the subway tunnels underneath New York City. They thought they were safe down there. They were wrong. One day while searching the subway, they came across an odd room. Filled with empty pizza boxes, skateboards, and martial arts equipment, they had stumbled upon a lair. From the back room four shadowy figures emerged, weapons raised. The resistance had found what they needed to turn the fight around. Four adolescent, genetically altered, warrior reptiles named:
* Captcha
* Mobile Redirects
* Removing Functionality for the App
* Phone Keyboards
Resistance leader John Condor, day 724 of Robot rule. Voice log entry 724F. Our defenses continue to hold against the clankers. Our security checkpoints somehow have prevented them from passing despite their technological superiority. June, our hacker, rigged up some sort of optical camouflage for some of the checkpoints. Looks like distorted letters and numbers on top of a wavy multi-colored background interferes with their optical sensors. Some of the other checkpoints have a simple button mechanism that miraculously stops them as well. And even if they were to somehow bypass the gates, only us humans can follow the road signs back to the base.
Log entry 728A. We’ve survived another night of hunts. A few injuries here and there, but luckily no casualties. Checking our supply inventory on our secure intranet has been... iffy as of late. I need to check with our tech guy Jorge, but every time I go to check the supply list it pulls up some list keeping application that wants me to make an account and log in. I don’t want to do that. Then when I go back I’ve got to do this convoluted dance to get stuff checked. It’s just a nightmare. I thought we left this stuff back in the old world. Condor out.
Log entry 728B. I JUST GOT DONE TRYING TO CHECK SUPPLIES, WENT ON TO OUR MED UNIT STATS AND THEY WERE GONE AND JORGE SAYS I’VE GOT TO USE A SEPARATE DAMN MEDICAL APPLICATION TO DO THAT. It’s quote, more efficient that way. Now I’ve got all these different programs to go back and forth through instead of just using the old one that had it all. I swear, I’d rather go up top and fight those bolt lickers with my bare hands than deal with this crap. Out.
Log entry 728H. This damn holo-tablet’s gonna be the death of me, I swear. I spend more time yelling at it than I do my soldiers. All the dust down here clouds up the keyboard sensor and makes typing anything in damn near impossible. Even when it’s clean the damn thing barely works. Clicking around on things I don’t click on. I’m getting old, my hands are all banged up from the war and you need some damn surgeon’s hands just to use the thing. That’s why I switched to these voice logs in the first place. Need Jorge to cook me up a voice controller for this thing. Out.
Things have been looking up for us ever since we met those nasty toad looking’ fellas down here. They can kick some gear head ass I tell you. Anyways, I need to remember to put in my vote for movie night next month. And I should pop in to the mess hall more often, see what they’re talking about https://discord.gg/pMsdPQm, see if I can’t spare some change for their hard work Patreon.com/HWIDG .
