Episode 36 - Leap Frog Believers
/Be sure not to grind your teeth (unlike Buck) as you vent your frustrations with us this week as we bring in the following issues:
- New Phones
- Leaving your kids in a hot car
- Passing Leap Frog
- Job True Believers
They've become a part of our everyday lives. Smartphones were first predicted (supposedly) by Tesla when he dreamed of a device that would allow you to communicate with anyone in the world and access the entirety of human knowledge, all while fitting in the pocket of your shirt. But did Tesla foresee planned obsolescence? Something tells me he didn't. It seems like every few months there's a new latest-and-greatest in smartphone technology, but does anything actually change from one iteration to the next? Furthermore, are all brands of smartphone slowly merging into one in terms of design and functionality? Are you simply paying for the same phone over and over again? Potentially. Probably. It seems like about a year after you get your phone, the same problems keep creeping up: they get slower, they start to glitch, hardware begins to fail, and the battery life goes down the drain. And nobody wants to have to stop during their work day to charge their phone. Especially if you don't have an outlet charger at work, so you have to take your phone to charge in your car. It's either freezing or smoldering hot, and being left in a hot car is really bad for your phone. It's also bad for some other things . . .
It seems like every week I see two more reports of kids or pets being left in a hot car. This is assinine. Stop it. Just stop it. I hate to be preachy, but maybe if you can't be bothered to think about the fact that your car gets really really hot in the summer, and your kid or pet will die if left in a really really hot car, maybe you shouldn't be having kids or pets. Especially since a modicum of common sense is all that's required to A) recognize that there is a danger and B) figure out any of the several methods of avoiding that danger. Like, don't leave your kid in the car; take them with you. Or, if you absolutely must leave the kid in the car, leave it running with the air conditioning on, and don't be gone long. Or just hire a babysitter. Or don't go out. It really boggles my mind that anyone could pass a test to operate a vehicle and not grasp this simple concept. But there are vehicular concepts that lots of people, it seems, have a hard time with . . .
Cruise control. It's your friend. It's that little angel that sits on your shoulder and says "Hey, buddy, you have a problem with maintaining the correct speed. Let me take that over for you." It's the thing that keeps you from driving like a jerk. But, some people can't seem to grasp the concept, so they speed up and slow down as the winds of fate blow them around, like detritus in an alley. What ends up happening is that you will pass someone, and then slow down and they will pass you, and then you'll speed up again. It becomes a vicious cycle known as Passing Leap Frog. But, unlike the version of leap frog you played when you were a kid, this one involves a four thousand pound car, travelling upwards of fifty five miles an hour, and instead of having fun, everyone else wants to strangle you. Is it really that hard to just set your cruise control and stay out of the way? Why are you even out on the road? Is it because you just love driving? Well, I might believe you, but there are some things that you don't just do for the love it . . .
Everyone, at some point in their adult life, comes across this stereotype: the company butt-kisser. The one who shows up early, makes the coffee, and talks about how much they love the company. ALL GLORY TO THE COMPANY! But, if that paycheck stopped showing up, would they still suckle from the dry teat? Would they still talk about how much they believe in the mission? Are they a Job True Believer? There's a harsh reality, and that is that you only have a job because you need money. If you didn't need money, you'd sit around at home, not doing anything, because existence is hard, and we tend to avoid effort at all costs. So, don't ever believe the lie that you're at work for anything other than a paycheck. Nobody has time for lies, especially on the clock.
Someone calls in a solution to the Rewards Card issue from last week, Tab gets taken to task over taxes, and Uncle Buck calls in with an issue. Wait, what? If you want to know what's going on, you're going to have to listen to this week's episode!
