Welcome fans to the smallest episode of the month. Minisode 5 where we discuss these small ball issues.
- Weird Hairs
- Being Hot & Cold at the same time
- Not winning a bike at the circus
- Online Volumization
- Tweet Diatribes
You're getting to that ripe old age of 27 and what are you getting? Weird fuckin hairs growing from areas they shouldn't be growing from. What the fuck is your deal? If you want to be a beard hair grow in the beard, if you want to be a chest hair grow on the chest. YOU'RE IN NO MAN'S LAND YOU CUNT!
The only thing worse than that is the bodies temperature regulation system that in the dire emergency of being in bed, decides to cut its losses with the arms and face and crank up the heat for the legs and the back of your head. Hey stupid body, if you just sent it to the parts not under the blanket I'd certainly survive.
Tim almost had a catastrophic accident this week, following our mini news segment he blinked way too hard and sent his contact lens into the corner of his eye pausing the show for several minutes. Journalists like Tim Pool experience this level of danger every day, and god bless them for it.
Back on track I bring in an issue 24 years in the making. Not winning a bike at the circus. You could say my family is circus addicted, we go all the time, there is never a bad time to go to the circus. Every time intermission rolls around and we go looking in the program, "Is this year our year" we hope to ourselves. NO, NO IT FUCKING ISN'T! At this point all of the circuses should just give us a bike as a thank you for our years of patronage.
Do you ever watch youtube videos and think man, I can barely hear this, and then swap to another one and go deaf? Yeah apparently google can protect us from googling bad words but they can't be bothered to run an algorithm to equalize the audio levels on all of their videos. Sons of bitches.
Finally this description will be shared on twitter for everyone to see what they are missing, it will only take 9 tweets to do it too. I know I could just post a link to this patreon page, but I'm a fuck face jonesing for some twitter likes like a moron.
Thanks again for sponsoring us this month on HWIDG we hope to see you next month for some more amazing shows. As Joel used to say, Ciao Ciao Mother Fuckers.