In a world, where the innocent are ravaged by both MegaCorp soldiers and junkie gangs looking for a fix, there is only one podcast prepared to take on these injustices: RoboHWIDG. Watch in glorious stereo and Technicolor as RoboHWIDG dispenses its vigilante justice on these issues:
-The YouTube Invasion
I like murder. I like murder mysteries, I like seeing vigilantes dole out murder, hell I like flocks of crows. I like killing so much, I kill TIME. But everywhere around me, there’s people just ignoring all the possible murder they could be doing! Look people, you gotta make room for murder in your life. Take a step back, relax, and lay the smack down on some chronal units. You’ll be much happier. Have you ever seen a sad serial killer? That’s what I thought.
It used to be, back in the day, when you would hit something on the road, it was one of two things. Either you just helped tame the rabid coyote population of the town you were in, or you put some hobo out of his misery. In our hustle and bustle of modern life now, chances are it’s neither and it’s just some speed humps. Somehow these coyotes and hobos banded together and got these installed everywhere, and now they’re copulating into a stinky coyote/hobo mutant breed. So, uh, watch out for those.
They won’t be the first of your problems though. First, you’ll have to survive the YouTube invasion. They’ll start with the bombings. Mass thumbs downs everywhere. Next, the sleeper cells are activated. Good, hard working people that you’ve known your whole life will grab you in your sleep, shake you and yell "GET YOUTUBE RED”. Then, the final phase: total destruction. Spiderman and Elsa from Frozen will descend from the heavens, twerking on and pranking everyone until we all submit.
And as you walk through what used to be the streets of Chicago, now known as Google State Sector 115.AX, with your aging, second generation feeding device beeping at you, warning of low battery, you’ll be wishing for a universal feed port. But no, the competing companies made like five different kinds, and changed them every year. So now you have to tear open a feed pod, re-hydrate it, and force yourself to swallow it. Good luck buddy, that last one’s liver and onion flavored.
We also taste test this week's voicemails to see if they're as spicy as last week's. Usually this is where we thank you for listening, but not this week. This week we'd like to say SCREW YOU, DROP WHATEVER YOU'RE DOING RIGHT NOW AND LISTEN TO THIS OR WE'LL SHOOT YOU IN THE DICK, CREEP. Don't forget to join the Discord!