Hey there big fella, and welcome to another sensual episode of Here’s What I Don’t Get. Don’t worry, just sit back, relax, and let us take care of it. After we’re done you can tell us all about your issues with:
* Local News
* Other People's Bathrooms
* Shower Sex
* The Pre-Sleep Self-Cringe Marathon
Tonight’s story: Is Local News Relevant? After a harrowing 26 year investigation, our top reporter, Tad Dirt, is finally ready to reveal the answer to the question we’ve all been asking. Tad, is local news relevant? Tad? I’m sorry folks, it seems we’re having some technical difficulties right now, we’re not able to locate our repo-hold on. Hold on, I’m hearing from the producers that Tad was found in his dressing room, dead. It seems that 26 years of putting up with small town local news was just too much. Chilling. Now we throw it to Bruce, who’s over at Chopeka High waiting for the big game to start! Bruce?
Using the bathroom is a sacred act to me. There’s something very personal about it. So when you’re in someone else’s bathroom, and the layout is weird, or you’ve gotta jiggle the handle, or you can’t find the TP, it just feels weird. But also, there’s a sense of invading their privacy. “This is where they poop.” You can’t help but to think about it. Your ass is touching where their ass touches. Your asses just kissed, congratulations.
Speaking of two asses kissing, shower sex is a thing. A thing that most people think would be nice and romantic. But we’re here to tell you the truth, not to fill your heads with erotic fantasies! I catch myself almost slipping and cracking my head open just by myself all the time, but you add another person in to that mix? Recipe for disaster. Add a bunch of bottles and the shower curtain, and wet hair slapping around and you’re in for a bad time. Or are you?
You’ve been working hard all day, tough but fulfilling, you’ve made it home and cooked up a wonderful meal. You watch some Netflix or play a couple hours of your favorite game with no interruptions. Life is good. You slip into that warm bed, lay your head down, close your eyes and drift offWAIT HERE’S ALL THE AWKWARD THINGS YOU’VE EVER DONE IN PERFECT RECOLLECTION. REMEMBER THAT TIME JENNY FROM HIGH SCHOOL INVITED YOU OVER TO STUDY AND YOU BLEW HER OFF?! YOU BLEW IT YOU DUMB SONOVABITCH! DAMN YOU BRAIN!
All that and more on our raunchiest episode yet. Who calls in? What’s that about a garbage bag full of gumbo? And which one of us reads some poorly written video game sex? FIND OUT ON THE NEXT EPISODE OF HERE’S WHAT I DON’T GET Z! Join the PATREON and DISCORD for even more sexy anime shenanigans!