Episode 290 - Plasma Nails (ft. Ninja Andy)

This week on HWIDG, we get our yearly check up from Doctor Andy! It's weird that his office was in an abandoned building, but hey the parking was free! Now that I mention it, Doctor Andy was a bit weird. His hands were very clammy and his breath smelled like bathtub gin, and he didn't use any lube when he checked our butt. Dentists usually don't do that. Anyways he says we should stick to a healthy diet of:

- Poster Sizes
- Uppity Contractors
- Property Management
- Superglue

You want to frame a nice poster or art piece? You better hope it's a standard size, otherwise you're paying hundreds of bucks for a custom frame job. Or you can be like Tab, he likes his framed posters like Madcucks, slovenly dressed and without a job.

Contractors are like stand-up comics in the 80's. Lazy insulters. "That wall looks like your wife's face, boom!" "Check out the eggshell clashing with the cream in this room, YOWZA!" "Try the veal, I'll be here 'til Thursday, even though I should've been done three weeks ago!"

Landlords are called so for a reason. They consider themselves lords. Lording over your right to rent like a prison warden. One wrong move and you'll head to solitary. Also like prison wardens, they're usually corrupt and are bad at their jobs.

Superglue is like kryptonite. Back in the day the green rock could stop Superman dead in his tracks, and superglue could bond together even oil and water. But now Superman is too strong for regular kryptonite, so they had to invent Ultra Strong Rainbow Kryptonite. Unfortunately for superglue they haven't got that far so we're stuck with what is essentially watered down horses.

All this and more on this week's episode! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD, support us through the end on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT.