Episode 224 - Get Funged
/This episode of HWIDG is brought to you by aliens. They're out there somewhere. Observing us. Watching us flail around in our digital infancy, laughing at our continued use of physical munitions, and betting on what dumb thing we'll send to space next instead of, you know, ourselves. Whether they be little green men, tall greys, or badass avian-insectoid C-SEC officers you wanna bone, we will come in contact with them one day and we will learn that all that we humans have to our names are:
- Virtual School
- Smoker Damage
- Gender Spectrum
- NFTs
Remember school? Riding the bus? Hangin' with your buds? Playing Magic in the Anime club-I mean copping a feel during an assembly? Making fun of the kid with the weirdly shaped head? Sneaking out to smoke some crystal behind the gym? Well, guess what? You can't do none of that anymore. Not virtually at least. And that was the fun stuff. Virtual school has irrevocably changed the actual way that kids are taught. Good luck getting a kid to be interested in the wonders of science when she can't dissect an animal, make a giant Rube Goldberg machine, see dry ice sublimate right in front of her, or make a potato-powered lightbulb?
Is there anything more caustic than cigarette smoke? You might as well carry an unshielded nuclear-powered reactor around with you. It's killing you slowly and ruining literally everything round you. It's filling everything you own and everywhere you go with the scent of burnt tar, ammonia, formaldehyde and whatever other horrible things they can fit in those death sticks. God forbid you own anything of value, there's a reason Craigslist and eBay listings will proudly say "from a smoke-free household". Your yellowed stinky junk is relegated to be sold for a penny. A penny.
In 2021, get ready for the newest blockbuster film: RISE OF THE SUPERS. From a distant planet far, far away, the Supers have arrived on Planet Earth to wreak havoc on its citizens. Infecting ordinary people with the deadly S-virus. Now, with Super-infected Soldiers running amok on Earth, what will we do to stop them? From the director of TRAPPED: BONER CONFUSION and THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE, this action blockbuster is sure to be a SUPER good time!
What exactly is a non-fungible token? It's like the deed to a digital item. There's just one problem. IT'S DIGITAL. It already exists! For free, even! SO what if you've got the deed to it? It entitles you to nothing. It's not like an original DaVinci painting you can hang in your house. It's not the only copy of an unreleased Wu-Tang Clan album. It's not the master film reel to Rhinestone. It means nothing, yet these crypto blockchain idiots are spending millions of dollars on tweets. TWEETS. PUBLICLY AVAILABLE TWEETS!
All this and more on this week's episode! Don't forget to join us on DISCORD, and support us on PATREON or by BUYING A SHIRT!